Hello, hello, hello, my mystic sistars. Welcome back. It is your host here, Jessica Mystic, and today, today on this episode of, I should be calling it podcasting with a puppy because he is in the room, so we are going to be hearing him chewing his thing, doing his thing, whatever it is he's up to, but we are in vibe.
We are a vibe. As you can see if you're watching on YouTube, I am less of a hot mess today and more myself, wearing my vibe, vibe, vibe, vibe, my high vibin shirt. You know? My hair, I, you know, I just have frazzled, frenzied hair. It's just the way it is. But we're a little more put together. We're a little bit jacked because we're fucking coming out of it.
Like, this is the season. We've been talking about spring clean ups, bringing forward, you know, being feeling buried, working through overwhelm. And getting into that whole, like, blossoming phase. Here we fucking go. This is where we amp it up. We are bringing the energy. And in today's episode, I'm gonna be asking you, like, do you know when you get really excited and really jacked and you're like, Okay, Q2.
It's Q2. Like, Q1 is dead to us, right? Like, Q1 is over. Fucking dumpster fire beginning of a year. It's done, we move on. Look at the stats, don't get hung up on the stats. We move on, we move forward, we learn and we grow. Now, when we move into a new phase, and we move into a new cycle, and a new quarter, a new whatever it may be, we're hitting up Q2 here, we get excited, we have new projects, we start daydreaming about the summer, things we can do, things we want to get done mid year, you know, planning launches for the fall, all of this stuff is so exciting, but very quickly, that excitement, can become overwhelmed.
And when that excitement becomes overwhelmed, we're stuck again in this power struggle. So today's episode, we are going to discuss ways to like use our own mindfulness and even like physical movement and like mindful, I'm going to say, I don't like saying meditation because it's more like movement meditation, but ways to work through these moments where you're feeling stuck in this power struggle between your mind and your heart or your drive or your disdain Transcribed We want to learn how to navigate this so we can continue to lead ourselves to our next level success, to our better version of ourselves, so that we can actually show up and not just burn out and fucking fall apart.
You feel me? Let's get into it.
Hello, and we're back. So, my Mystic Sis stars, welcome to The Sorority with your host, Jessica Mystic, and let's dive in. So, I want to start off this episode by really anchoring into, I've worked with this crystal today and realized it's kind of caught my throughout the week, last week. It's caught my eye a few times while I've been in my office and it's just kind of been like, Hey, like, Hey, you should probably come check in. Hey, come play with me. So I've been working with Mookite Jasper and Mookite Jasper, also known as Australian Jasper.
It's like, I'll show you this one here. It's pretty beautiful. If you're watching on YouTube, you can see it. Mookite Jasper is extremely great for grounding and balance, but not just like typical, like I'm so grounded. I'm so balanced. I'm so balanced. This is like balancing the inner with the outer, okay?
Like, like all, like getting out of our head and into our body is one thing, but like, when we're manifesting, there's a lot of energy that's moving so, Mukayt Jasper, the inner and the outer. So when we are trying to manifest our desires, when we are setting goals, when we are praying, things that are in our brain, we need to actually ask for out loud, right? If we don't ask for help, we do not receive help. Often it's like, well, if I'm, I'm suffocating to death, if I don't do it myself, we have all these thoughts and we go do a damn thing, but if you ever actually communicated your thoughts from the inside of your head.
out of your mouth and ask and communicate it to somebody. Whether you are asking a loved one to help you or support you, whether you are asking a friend, whether you are asking an employee, you have to ask in order to receive, right? You have to verbalize that want and that need. And the same goes with like prayer.
or manifestation. You have to ask and say there's more power in getting the energy of your words and articulating your needs in order to receive. So finding the balance from outer and inner and being able to open up to new possibilities and experiences and new things that aren't really even on your, on your radar right now.
This is where Mookite comes in because Mookite you still have a deep desire for these experiences, but you can approach it with more of a calm discernment so that you can actually face these new experiences feeling, feeling like a sense of peace, a sense of wholeness. This really helps support like decision making.
So if you're ever kind of, we're always stuck, you know, we're very, I'm very impulsive, but also very indecisive at the same time. Like I just, I don't want to miss out on anything. Like I have mega fucking FOMO, like you feel me mega FOMO. Like if I do this, I want all the things. Oh, like french fries. Like french fries.
When I have french fries, I need to have ketchup, mayo, and if gravy's an option, I need all three. I don't want to miss out. Even better if I can have like, ketchup and gravy drizzled over them. So they're just kind of amalgamated, that's fine. But I still need a section that's plain so I can experience the plain french fry.
Like, I need to have multiple dips all the time. So this way, with MooKite, I can approach this plate of french fries with a calm knowing that I'm going to experience everything that is meant for me in the way that I desire. And be able to move through eating this plate of french fries. That is my life and all the things that I want to do with it.
Right? So, Mookite helps us, because we're grounded and because we're calm, we're able to, it points out those possibilities of where, where we should be headed. Just like how it pointed out to me, like, hey, hi, over here. You're coming, you're coming out of your little hole and your little, your little, you know, burned everything down.
Let's start rebuilding. Hello, can I help you? Have you checked this out? It helps us accept change. www. mookite. com Moocrite helps us accept change, helps us make the choices from a calmer state. And when we're calmer in making these decisions, when we're not frazzled and frantic and in overwhelm, we can actually have a deeper rooted excitement.
Now, yeah, you can be calm and excited, believe it or not. You can actually be Confidently excited. And that's what makes us successful as entrepreneurs, as business owners, even as mothers. When you know you're fucking killing it, parenting the one day, and you're like, yeah, we hit up the fucking water park, the kids are having a great time, and everything was great, and I handled everything well, it's because you're in an energy of excitement, but calm.
Whereas when you're really excited, and you want to do something, but you're in that desperation, like, oh, I'm so excited, but how am I going to make it happen? You start getting stressed and overwhelmed, and then overstimulated, and then, like, That's when you start, like, snapping at your loved ones, or, like, you irritable more, or you just, everything's falling apart because you just don't want to keep it together, and you really want this to happen, it's a different kind of excitement, that's where it shifts into the nervousness and the overwhelm.
Well, now I gotta make it happen. So, here we're getting grounded, and we're grounded in a way that we're actually channeling our ability, our self. Our ability, we're channeling our own inner voice and our own strength, the way that we show up, the way that we want to be seen.
It's taking back our power and our voice so that we're not stuck in a power struggle. We're taking back our power in the sense of, Like, look, I see it all the time. This is a really big one right now. I've talked about it a few times even with clients and some of the coaching containers I've been hosting.
So many entrepreneurs right now, especially if you are on the spectrum and divergent or atypical, you are drowning when doom scrolling because you are trapped in the habit of seeking ideas and permission or approval or trying to be as good as someone else on the internet. And you could sit down and have like this great like, these points you want to talk about in your content this week.
Be like, this is what I want to say, and then all of a sudden someone shows up on your feed and you're like, Oh fuck, they said it this way, now I can't say it that way. Oh, if they're doing that, I should, oh they've done it already. And you start to second guess yourself, well maybe I should say it like them.
Oh look, lots of people are commenting, maybe I should comment something. Or do something like that, and I should get people to comment, and I'm not doing it right. I don't have comment. You start comparing, you start criticizing, you start overanalyzing, and you start shape shifting into who you think you need to be.
And now you're overwhelmed because you don't know who the fuck you are again. And all of the work that you've been doing falls down the drain, and you feel like shit, and you fell off the wagon, and you're like, oh great, now I have to start over, nothing matters. Sound familiar? And if not, you're lucky. So again, searching.
We're searching. We're always searching for permission, searching for new opportunities, searching for ways to make things work. It's like a game. We're almost addicted to the high and the dopamine that we get for finding new ways to make money, finding new ways for people to come into our world, finding new connections, new conversations, getting fixated on people is a big thing that happens with atypicals.
Whether it's a client you love working with, a leader that you like in the online space. When we lead into this hyperfixation, and this is what makes us feel like we need permission to show up a certain way or to be seen a certain way, even when it comes to your beliefs, Like, I know that I've messaged because, I've messaged one of my mentors at one point because I, I just want her to say it was okay for me to think or feel this way.
You know, and like she called me out on it. She's like, you just really want me to tell you this is okay. It's true. I just really want her to tell me it was okay to be this way. Because when we take our mask off, and we start doing what we want, and we get excited, we're excited because it's something that, That fuels our purpose, our soul, our heart.
But then we share those dreams or those visions with people who are not on the same wavelength, and it brings us down. I call them dream killers, because they are dream killers. And even as something as simple as your faith or your trust in others. For example, when I started going to a church, I have people in my family just like, Why?
My answer was, Why not? I do what I want. I do what I want. I worship who I want. I go where I want. I live life the way I want. I don't need to actually explain myself to anybody else. But I've lived in a state my whole life. I've lived in a state my whole life where I've always been seeking permission to be in a space to not feel an intruder.
Like, is it okay that I'm here? Am I, am I bothering anyone? You know, am I allowed to be here? Am I doing it right? Am I doing it wrong? If I'm here, what do I need to do to prove that I can be here? This is where, this is where the struggle comes in. And the reason I'm bringing this up today is because in this power struggle, there's a couple things that happened this week that reminded me of all of this.
For example,
this sweet little puppy of mine has decided to start digging holes. in the small patch of grass we actually have in our backyard. We have a nice little square patch of grass. Half of it's astroturf, half of it's grass. But he decided to dig in the actual grass. I was like, no, it's not even a lot of grass.
I just want to keep it nice. So I've got holes in my yard. Now I'm freaking out to my husband because I'm like, ah, like, you know, these are holes in my yard and I don't want holes in my yard. What am I going to fill them with? I got to fill them. I don't want the kids to, like, get their foot stuck and break their ankle, like, there goes summer, right?
Then my kid's gonna be in a fucking cast, so I go into ultimate doom mode. These holes are like gopher holes, my kids are gonna break their ankles, they're gonna roll their feet, they're gonna break a toe, they're gonna smash your face off the ground when they trip, all these horrible things go through my mind.
And I'm like, I need to fill them. We can't leave them this way. So immediately I'm like, well, we're going to have to look online. Like, what kind of dirt should I fill them with and how am I going to fill them? I got to get the grass to grow back in them because I'm going to fill them and be dark spots.
And immediately perfectionism is freaking out because I'm like, well, now I'm going to have an ugly patch of grass in my yard. It's going to drive me nuts because it's, it's just weird. There was two holes and now there's a third one. So I guess that made it better because for some reason three is better than two.
Don't know why it's just the way it is. So, Freaking out, I'm like, I need dirt. My husband was in the shower as I'm like, having this moment. I'm just like, what are we going to do? Like, where am I going to go get this dirt? Like, it's not, is the dirt ready? Like, I haven't been to the hardware store or the garden store.
Are they even open yet? Like, usually that stuff opens after May long and I'm just going down the rabbit hole. How do I solve this problem? I got holes in my yarn. My husband turns around and says to me, I don't care what kind of fucking dirt you put in the hole. Just put some dirt in it. If that's a problem, fill it up.
Who gives a shit? We'll fix it later! We can pack our like, who cares? Just put dirt in the hole! And if it's the wrong kind of dirt, and the dirt doesn't stay, we'll put more dirt in the hole! We'll get dirt later! Just go put some dirt in it! And I was like, well I have to go buy dirt! And he's like, you don't have any dirt outside?
And I'm like, well I have all those pots with all the dead flowers from last year. Those have dirt in them. Oh, I guess I could use those. So the next day, my kids went outside, and we went and we just grabbed dirt from the pots and filled the holes. And now the holes are filled. So I made a really big deal out of something that really wasn't that big of a deal because it threw me off.
It threw me off course. Oh no, now something is ruined. Now I have to read. Oh no, something's wrecked. I have to redo it. I have to fix it. I don't know how to fix it. I wasn't meant to do this right now. I just noticed this and it's already nighttime and it's, you know, how do I deal with this? It just threw me off course.
And I like needed my husband to tell me how to solve this problem. All I had to do was put dirt in the hole. I knew this. It's not hard. But I needed him to tell me it was okay to use the dirt that we already had. Even though, I just, I didn't want to do it wrong. I had to do it perfect. But, I don't know.
It's just this whole thing. We got so worked up over dirt in a hole and the wrong dirt. Nobody, who gives a fuck? So if you're worrying about the holes, fill them up and move on. Stop worrying about all the other things you're putting into it. It's a hole. Fix it and go. And if it doesn't work, Do it another way.
This is entrepreneurship. We're going to have bumps in the road, and you have to know that not everything is going to work exactly as you think, and you're going to learn the wrong way along the way. We have to break that cycle, because that perfectionism and that overthinking causes the overwhelm, which then takes away from everything else.
And now this week, you go to yesterday, actually, I was going to the gym, and my husband says to me in text message, I don't have my stuff. Okay. So, now, you send Jessica a message that says, I don't have my stuff. I mean, like, okay. So, I'm getting it for you, or are you coming home to get it, and then you'll take me.
So, I was like, assuming, like, oh, okay, so you're coming home to get it, you can take me then. But there was no answer, so I waited. And I could have gone to the gym. Like, I could have just grabbed his stuff and gone to the gym and met him there. But I'm waiting. Well, now it's like five minutes to class. I know it takes like seven minutes to get there.
I know I'm going to be late. I tried to phone him. I tried to message him. He's not answering. I'm getting all worked up. I'm getting frustrated. And I'm like, you know, I should have just left. I should've just left and gone to the gym and done my thing, and if he wants to come he can get there, and I'm so mad, I'm like, you know, why would you keep me waiting?
Why wouldn't you just answer? All you have to do is answer, and if you're gonna send me a message, why wouldn't you send a message with a direction, go without me, or bring my stuff for me, or I'm not going?
So this whole time, I'm thinking as I'm driving, I'm like, you know, like, made me late, and how, how dare he make me late, not answer me on time, or at least give me direction. Then I stopped myself and went, oh wait, I am a grown adult. I am a woman in her late 30s. Who, when he says he doesn't have his stuff, that either means he's not coming or he wants me to bring it for him.
I have my own vehicle. I already intended on going myself in my own vehicle on time anyway. Nothing was stopping me from getting in the car and just going to the gym, because he's a grown man. He can come home and get his shit and meet me there or ask me to bring it. I don't need his permission to wait for him or to go myself.
I could just say, oh, okay, no problem, I put your stuff in my bag and I'll meet you there, or see you at home after, end of story. It didn't have to I allowed it to make me feel frustrated when he had no intention of fucking up my schedule or making me late for the gym. He never told me to wait for him. He never told me not to go. He never told me to He didn't tell me to do anything for him. He actually didn't expect anything from me. He was just simply stating he didn't have the stuff. I can do with that what I will. My mom was already overwatching the kids.
Why did I make a whole diss like I needed him to be home in order to go? So from this, the reason I'm sharing this, are you waiting and seeking permission or for someone in your life to, to say it's okay to feel a certain way, to dream a certain dream, to start that business, to take that course, to sign on with that mentor, to, to buy that thing you want so badly.
Are you waiting for someone to tell you it's okay? Like, when are you going to start listening to yourself and doing what you want? You are fully capable of driving yourself. to your own future success. You don't need permission from anybody else and you actually don't need to explain your vision or your dream or your desires to anybody.
You do not need to justify the actions you make. We are allowed to decide and discern what we want to do at any given point in our own lives. If we want to learn, if we want to go, if we want to grow, if we want to sell, if we want to start over, if we want to buckle down and do more, like we get to decide. We get to decide what we want to do with our lives. We get to decide, we get to decide what kind of life we want to live. Who we want to be a part of it. Who we want to spend our time with. How we want to spend our time. How much time we want to spend with whom.
We get to choose. We have the power of choice. So when we're feeling excited, and we're feeling driven, when we lean into that, and decide to put our decisions first, That's what's going to manage the overwhelm. And when we're feeling indecisive and uncertainty starts to creep in, that's where you need to choose to work with someone who can lead you through it.
Hire a mentor. Be in a container or a mastermind where you can have support. Join a free Facebook community, like this is, this is what I work on with my mentors. You need to have someone that you can confide in and trust to help lead you through these moments, so that you can become the own leader in your life that you need so desperately in order to succeed.
The only permission you need is your own, and sometimes you just need to be reminded of that. So this is me reminding you today, that's all that you need. You don't need to show up any more, any less for anybody other than how you want to show up. This is why I keep saying it's the era of self expression.
And this is what's led me to create these new opportunities.
This is why I, when I said I burned everything down and I've been rebuilding, I have found such freedom in actually listening to what it is that I wanted to do and who I wanted to work with and how I wanted to work, but really sitting with it and understanding. You only need, your offer suite doesn't need to be complicated.
You don't need to have all the things. You don't need to offer all the things. If you have a service that you're offering and when someone books it, you're like, uh, why are you doing it?
Like, oh, they're a long time client. I don't want to disappoint them by not doing anymore. I stopped doing lashes because they took too long. They hurt my back and they didn't make me as much money in the amount of time that I did them. So it was a business decision and as fun as it was, yeah, I invested time and energy money into it, but it wasn't getting me the results that I wanted.
So when I left lashes, yeah, people were disappointed. And when I left tattooing, it was really hard for me to leave tattooing. Like, full disclosure, I had work that wasn't finished. There was ongoing projects, and I felt like I was letting so many people down, and it killed me to close my shop, and it killed me when I had to announce I was no longer tattooing, and I was going to be a stay at home mother during the pandemic.
with my babies. And I felt so ashamed of that. And the fact that I felt ashamed of wanting to be a mother to my children and not be at a loss. Because back then, at that point, I didn't know how to run a business successfully. I knew how to be a tattoo artist, but I didn't know how to run a business. No one teaches you that shit.
You know, posting on your, your IG is just a online portfolio. Like, no one knows how to sell or book clients or like all is just a mess. A lot of tattoo artists still do that. They're still using their IG as a portfolio. It's not meant to be an online portfolio. It's your way of marketing and booking people.
But anyway, that's a whole other podcast. So, leaving tattooing, I felt like a failure. I felt I was letting people down. I was scared people would be outraged, upset with me. For those Like, I have a firm no refund policy, so I was like, well, how the fuck am I going to do this? I'm going to have to refund people, or do gift cards, and in the end, it all worked out.
Leaving tattooing, a lot of individuals came over and they got services done in lieu of, and it was fine. Everything, everything works out. You just have to decide how you want to handle those situations. There's no right or wrong, and people have many different opinions on how you should or shouldn't do business, or how you should or shouldn't do transitions, or if you should or shouldn't do something.
But I had to lean into what felt good for me, and what was best for my family, and my future, and it wasn't to continue tattooing in a traditional sense. Just like now, I still have people who approach me who want work done by me, which I'm honoured by. But I physically can't handle doing a four to six hour tattoo session, even though I love it, even though I know I can do an amazing job and create an amazing piece for them.
I physically, my hands, my shoulders, my back, my neck, I cannot handle it anymore. And it doesn't serve me. to continue doing that anymore and that was a version of me that I said goodbye to. Now it's ironic I'm talking about this because I decided being April that I'm doing like a blast from the past birthday bash where I opened like four flash tattoo spots.
These are smaller spots that I opened up in my studio, so I'll be taking four people. They'll be small. Mid sized tattoos, like under, like, 4 48 inches, like, small, they'll be small, fine line, work, just for fun, just for funsies, right, just booking 4 little one off spots, cause 4 is my favorite number, it's my fucking birthday month, I do what I want, and I just felt like it, cause I get to have fun in my business.
I get to have fun in my life, and I get to have a fun event. Like, I want to throw a Bask in the Past birthday bash, do what I want. It's all in the energy of, I do what I want. I felt excited about it, so I'm fucking doing it. Threw it up in my stories, I didn't have to make a big long post plan, I didn't have to create this big overwhelm around it.
I'm like, I picked a day, and I was like, Okay, this is the day I'm doing it, I'm gonna have a four hour time period, I'll book four people, I will do four flash tattoos that day. That's it, it gets to be that simple. It gets to be that easy. I was really excited about leaning into more of like branding and messaging and on social media and helping my clients.
A lot of my clients have similar themes where they, they kind of feel lost. They start their business and they feel at a loss. Like, I just want to make this number. Well, I just want to be known for this. I just want to have more clients for this. I want to, I just learned the service and I want to do more of this.
And how do I do that? Cause we're multi passionate and Maybe they're getting bored. There's no shame in getting bored. Like, if you're only doing brows, it's like, okay, I'm only doing microblading. Okay, well, now I want to learn machine methods, powder, ombre, target shading. I want to be able to do a bit of everything.
Okay, I'm bored of brows. Then they add lips. And I'm like, okay, well, I want more lips now. You get to choose what your focus is. And that's what's a joy about having multi passionate, multi service menu. You can market brows for a while, then you can market lips for a while, then you can market paramedical for a while, and you can have like ebbs and flows where you track different clients into your world.
I have clients ask all the time, like, what do you find you're most busy and booked with? My honest answer is whatever the fuck I mark it for, but they won't understand that, so I just say, well, it goes in seasons, because depending, it depends on what I'm putting out there, because what I'm putting out there attracts what I want to bring in a book, right?
So I am in control, I don't need permission, I don't, The only permission you need is permission to sell to someone, and that's if you're having an honest conversation with somebody, whether it's for a class, for a service, with your students. The only permission you need to seek is permission to have a conversation.
You want to ask people if it's okay that you ask them some questions. You want to make sure that they want to have that conversation with you. Because if they don't, A, you're wasting your breath, and B, you're just being pushy and fucking weird. That's where you need to ask for permission. But you don't need to ask permission on how to run your business, run your life, or do whatever the fuck it is that you want, right?
Like, permission comes when you're affecting another person. Yes, you are going, your actions have consequences, but if you are directly going to be working on somebody, you need permission from them to do so. But when you're working on yourself, your life, your goals, your business, the only overwhelm that's really taking place is what you think needs to be done.
You are the one setting the standards for your own success and achievement. And, like, you start over seeking validation, over reaching, over investing, like, over committing out of, out of this overwhelm or this need to operate at a certain level. You can raise the standard without losing your sanity. You can still raise your standard and raise your boundaries to match.
Because you are the one who is, uh, Who is, you're the one granting permission to operate that way. You're the fucking boss. You are a creative CEO. You are the chief executor operations. You call the shots. So, I'm gonna end this podcast there with, you call the shots. Stop seeking external permission on how to think, feel, be, see, grow, show up in your life, in your business, in the, in your ideas.
in your actions. Just do what you want. Be in the energy of, I do what I want, and I don't need to justify it to anybody.
